


Tear Down The Spaces

by DaydreamDestiel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Coda, Coda: 12x12, Happy Ending, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-17
Updated: 2017-02-17
Packaged: 2018-09-25 03:50:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,045
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9801380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DaydreamDestiel/pseuds/DaydreamDestiel
Summary: Just a little missing scene starting with when Dean said, "Let's go home."





	

_ Let’s go home,  _ Dean said, so they did. At least Castiel, Sam and Dean did. Mary made a fast excuse shortly after they’d left and Castiel hadn’t missed the way Dean’s eyes had dimmed slightly when she didn’t follow them to the bunker. 

The whole drive back, Castiel’s heart had been beating erratically. Every time Dean’s eyes flicked to his in the rearview mirror, but that wasn’t new. The anxiety that underlaid it was, however, an unfortunately novel experience. 

_ I love you. _ And Dean knew it was meant for him, just him.  _ I love all of you. _ Because the other Winchesters were family too, but Dean was special. Dean was different, and if Castiel was going to die, he wanted to say it just once first. He’d never spoken those words to another being before, but he’d thought them so many times. 

First just about Dean, and later in a more familial way about Sam. Mary was their mother, and a Winchester, so he loved her too. Over the years, he’d been positive that they’d understood he cared for them, that they mattered to him. He’d said as much. And Castiel had learned quickly that Winchesters didn’t talk about their feelings in words. Not with _ those  _ words anyway. They said things like I need you, or you’re family. 

They tried to save you, even when it was just from yourself. Maybe especially then. Castiel couldn’t find it in himself to regret confessing to them. To regret that Dean knew. Somewhere deep down he thought, Dean surely must have always known. 

The Impala’s rumble as they drove through the darkness was soothing. Familiar. Funny how something like a car, just an object really, could become a comfort when it was associated with someone important. 

Eventually they arrived and Sam went to bed. Dean went for the coffee pot, and Castiel followed. Like he always did. Waited for Dean’s reaction with a pit in his stomach. Plenty of times before this, Castiel had puzzled over whether Dean might feel for him anything close to what Castiel felt for him, but it was always ambiguous. There were hints here and there that maybe Dean did, but they were easily explained away. 

So when Dean finally faced him with a mug of coffee cradled in his hands, and glanced at him over the white rim, Castiel had no idea what to expect. He swallowed and shifted his weight uncomfortably from foot to foot. The numbness after his near death experience had worn off a while ago and he still felt drained, shell shocked. 

“So… Back there when you...” Dean trailed off, then took a careful sip of his coffee. “You uh…” 

“Said I love you?” Castiel supplied with a nonchalant shrug of one shoulder when Dean trailed off unsurely again. 

Almost nervously Dean swallowed and Castiel watched his Adam’s apple bob with it, “Yeah. Um, how did you… Did you...”   


Dean’s green eyes were unreadable for a long moment as he studied him and Castiel openly looked into his in return, tried to assess the emotions hidden in them and failed. 

“I meant it in the sense that I’ve loved you for so long now, that it sometimes feels like without you I wouldn’t know who I was anymore.” Castiel answered honestly. 

Dean raised an eyebrow, “Okay, ‘cause that makes sense.” 

“Actually, it does.” Castiel replied with a bit of bite in his voice, but a faint smile that ticked up the corners of his mouth. “It means, I love you Dean. I meant it then, now and the hundreds of days before that when it was true too.” 

Another slow sip of his coffee like Dean was contemplating what he’d said and then he set his mug on the counter behind him, breathed, “Okay.” 

Dean was already walking toward him when Castiel had the sense to repeat, “Okay?” 

And then Dean’s rough palms cupped Castiel’s cheeks, and his forehead rested against Castiel’s. Two beats of Castiel’s heart passed where everything felt suspended and tense, and then Dean said, “Yeah, okay.” 

Sealed his words with a kiss that every molecule in Castiel’s body felt. Soft lips on his, firm and smooth, and then a slick, hot, tongue sought entrance to his mouth and Castiel melted into it. Needed more, so he kissed Dean hard with everything his limited knowledge had taught him, but any skill Castiel lacked, Dean certainly made up for. 

“God, Cas.” Dean groaned against his lips, “You almost died.” 

“I know. I’m sorry.” 

Desperately, Dean pressed closer to him, moved his hands down to wrap around Castiel and pulled him tightly to him. Castiel’s cheeks were wet, and he was confused for all of a moment until he pulled back enough to see Dean’s eyes full of pain, and grief. 

“I should’ve said I love you too. You- you coulda died and I-I-” 

Castiel shushed him, used his thumbs to wipe away Dean’s tear tracks and said, “But I didn’t. It’s alright now.” 

Gently, Dean shook his head, “I’m such a coward, I shoulda-” 

Lips on Dean’s cut him off, and Castiel used his body to push Dean until his back met the cupboards again, trapped him there. Anger, frustration and affection rushed through him in dizzying circles, because Castiel couldn’t stand idly by when Dean spoke of himself that way. 

He pulled back long enough to say, “You’re not. You’re the bravest person I’ve met. You faced a Prince of Hell tonight, and you could have left. I  _ told _ you to leave. Begged. And what did you tell me?” 

“You’re family.” Dean said softly, eyes on his feet. 

“And you’re mine. I’d prefer if you didn’t talk about my family like that.” 

Dean’s lips twitched up in a faint smile, “You know, I’m not gonna lie, I liked it better when you were trying to shut me up by kissing me.” 

“Of course you did.” Castiel said as he looked up at the ceiling, but a smile tugged at his lips too. 

“What?” Dean teased with a cocky smirk that Castiel had seen win over more than one woman at more than one diner. “You didn’t.” 

“Stop speaking please, Dean.” Castiel requested. 

“Maybe you should ma-” Dean’s voice cut off when Castiel kissed him again. 


End file.
